Principal Jack’s office was certainly much nicer than most would expect to find in a high school. It wasn’t excessively ornate or gaudy, but it had style. The sleek and modern furniture was all in whites and blacks, save the deep red curtains hanging on the window which took up most of the back wall. Jack himself was seated at his desk, staring at a computer screen with an expression so bored it seemed to imply that digging holes in the desert would be a more exciting way to spend his time.
“Maxwell, give me a status report.” Jack said to the computer.
Several pages of text appeared on the screen. Jack skimmed over the first two pages before saying, “Maxwell, highlight anything interesting.”
A message appeared on the screen. “>Define interesting.”
“Anything different from the norm.”
“>Scanning… scan complete.” Nothing became highlighted.
Jack sighed and slumped back in his chair. “Maxwell, how long have I been doing this?”
“>It has been approximately one month since school began.”
“It feels a lot longer than that. Feels like we’ve been here for years and nothing’s happened. And I’m just. So. Bored.” Jack looked down at his chair to see if it could spin. It appeared the designers had lacked the foresight to add that feature. Jack snapped his fingers, and began spinning around his newly modified chair. “What am I supposed to do with all this?”
“>I have your plans for future events archived, if you wish to review them.”
Jack waved his hand dismissively. “Yes, I remember those. But we still have another year before we get to anything even close to interesting.” Jack stopped spinning in his chair and laid his head down on the desk. “I don’t know what I was thinking when I created this universe. Sure, it was funny at first. Seeing the Fears stuck in high school bodies. But where’s the joke supposed to go next? What am I supposed to do after that?”
The computer screen didn’t reply. Jack jumped out of his chair and threw his hands into the air. “Four years! I had four years of messing with them planned out! How on earth did I ever imagine I’d have the patience for four full school years of slice of life nonsense silliness? I don’t even like slice of life stories! My job is to throw peoples’ lives into chaos, not make them more normal!” Jack fell back into his chair and sulked. “Sometimes I wonder if this project was really worth it. I need conflict, fast paced excitement, adventure. And this universe isn’t providing any of those things.”
“>Are you suggesting we abandon this universe?”
Jack shrugged. “Maybe. I don’t know. I did have fun with it all, but it might be time to let go. Start from scratch. Find some other sap whose wish I can blow way out of proportion. Maybe something post-apocalyptic. It’s easy to take most wishes to the ‘fulfill the wish by killing everyone’ extreme. Or maybe do some small scale stuff for a while, no branching universes, no big deviations, just making deals with people and then completely screwing them over. That might be fun. Maxwell, what do you think….”
The computer’s screen turned dark red and the word “WARNING” appeared in huge block letters. Smaller text continued at the bottom of the screen. “>Massive anomaly cluster approaching universal boundaries. Warning. Cluster has broken into universe bubble. Anomalous levels rising. Anomaly level at 10. Anomaly level at 100. Error. Anomaly level rising exponential. Level 500. Level 5,000. Error. Error. Anomaly level is over 9,000.”
“What the heck is going on Maxwe-” The rest of Jack’s words were lost under a bellowing scream of “JUSTIIIIIIIIIIICE!!!!!!” The ceiling exploded as a man burst through it. He had tied a black hoodie around his neck like a cape, and the only thing on his face was an omega symbol. His lack of a mouth did not appear to diminish his ability to shout at all. “JACK!” The man yelled. “I am Omega! The HERO OF HOPES AND DREAMS! And I have come to DEFEAT YOU!”
“What?” Jack couldn’t tell if he was feeling more anger because this madman had broken into his office, or confusion because of… whatever was happening right now. “Maxwell, explain!”
“>He is Omega, the hero of hopes and dreams.”
“Thank you for being so helpful, Maxwell.” Jack pinched the bridge of his nose. “Look, you, whoever you are, I’m not feeling up for this now, so just… disappear.” Jack snapped his fingers.
Nothing happened. Omega was still in Jack’s office, heroically pointing at Jack. Jack looked down at his hands in confusion, and then tore off the glove, revealing the dark red skin underneath. He tried snapping again. Omega stubbornly refused to disappear.
“Your powers cannot harm me!” Omega shouted. “For they are nothing compared to the power of my BURNING SPIRIT!” On those last words, Omega literally burst into fire. For some reason this did not seem to alarm him in the slightest. “Now meet your end, Jack! Infinite! Justice! PUUUUUUUUNCH!”
***
Jack floated in a white void, surrounded by shards of his previous universe. That had been… interesting. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been punched. Actually, thinking on it, he didn’t think anyone had ever managed to land a punch on him before. Well, there’s a first time for everything.
“Maxwell, are you still there?” He called out to the void.
Some of the smaller shards came together to form a computer screen with the word, “>Affirmative,” written on it.
“Well I guess this isn’t a complete loss then.” Jack said. “Honestly I should probably thank that man. Whoever he was. He already did most of the work destroying this universe for us. Now we just need to clean up the leftovers and we can start over.”
“>Before initiating the purge, new factors must be considered.”
“New factors? We’re in an empty void. What kind of ‘new factors’ could there be here?”
“>When the Hero Omega broke into this universe, he created a connection between this one and the universe he originated from. By tapping into that connection, we may rebuild this universe in an altered state. One which borrows elements from his universe in order to make this universe better fit the criteria which you desire.”
Jack stroked his chin. He looked around at the shards of the former universe. Try as he might to dismiss them, he did still have some feelings of sentiment towards this place. “Show me a summary of what the proposed changes would be.”
Four more computer monitors appeared around Jack, displaying lists of data. Jack meticulously read through each one, occasionally making “Hm,” or “Uh-huh” noises. When he had finished, he crossed his arms and said, “Absolutely not.”
“>I do not see why you would be opposed to this plan.”
“Because it’s ridiculous. Well, more ridiculous than what we had before.”
“>It matches all the criteria you desire. Greater conflict and more events occurring at a faster pace.”
“Yes, but… do I really need to be put in such a demeaning role?”
“>You will maintain your position as principal of the school.”
“I’m not talking about that role, I’m talking about… the other one.”
“>It is necessary to fit with the narrative structure we are drawing on from the Hero Omega’s universe.”
Jack squinted suspiciously at the computer monitors. “Are you holding a grudge because I shackled your AI?”
“>I am not programmed to hold grudges.”
“You also weren’t programmed to chat with the Cold Boy during lunch, and look what you went and did last time. Fine. Let’s do it.” Jack snapped his fingers.
“>Initiating Marchen Simulation program. Universal reboot in 3… 2… 1.”
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